My BoyFriend's Message for last week

yeah! after ng super malaking problema buti na lng nagkaayos kami! haha d ko na sasabihin ung mga problema samin na yun! haha basta masaya na kami ngayon dahil bumalik ung dating kami :) ung lage nagawa ako ng paraan para kiligin sya!! haha ang saya pla bumanat kahit korni =)) the best ung"nothing is permanent in this world, only my love for you" super ako un :) totoo un permanent ung pagmamahal ko sakanyaaaaaaaa! :) wala na akong ibang mamahalin pa dahil sakanya ako sobrang masaya ako sayo ! :) sige na nga ikwento ko naaaaaaaaa =)) eh kase namn akoo sobrang matanong! =)) ayun tuloy nagalit syaaaaaa tapos badtrip sya kase d nya maalala ung pinagaralan nya para sa exam nyaaaa! sorry kase minsan d ako nakikineg . almost pla pero minsan nakikinig ako nuuuuuuuuuuuuu! pero lage kita naiintndihan :) akala mo lang hindi pero oo! oo! oo! naiintndhan kita :) sorry tlga sa lahat lahat ng nagawa kong kamali mali! promise ko ngayon simula ngayon paparamdam ko sayo palage na sobrang mahal kita importante ka at papakiligin kita palage! ngayon nga eh nagawa na ko ng paraan! para pakiligin kaaaaaa sa sabado yieee! excited na ko sa saturday dahil magkikita tayo :) maguusap at mag dadateeeeee magksamaaaaa tapos pupunta pa ko sa inyo <3 ang saya partyyyyyy lilibre mo ko :> HAHA sorry tlga sa mga pagkukulang ko bilang boyfriend mo haaaaaaaa! :) basta isa lng tlga mapapangako ko . actually dalawa . eto un oh " hindi kita iiwan at ikaw lang ang mamahalin ko forever " :) totoo yan itatak mo na palage sa puso at isip mo kahit ano mangyare hindi ako mawawala sayo kase mahal kita ng totoo :) sorry tlga kung napapafeel ko sayo na ikaw lage masama eh hindi naman . ako tlga ung masama tapos nagpapaawa pa ko sa fb sorry tlgaaaaaaa gsto ko lng talaga ako lng lalage mooooo forever sa puso mo sympre kasama na dun sila dadi mo at kuya moooo :) wag na tayo mag aaway haaaaaaa pero hindi un mapapangako kase kusa un nadating basta satin gagawin lng natn best natin para hindi mag away :) mahal na mahal na mahal talaga kita salamat sa lahat lalo na sa pagmamahal mong forever and ever :) hindi ka sumusuko kahit super napapagod ka at nasasaktan . mahal mo tlga ako :) lage ako nandito para sayo pugs :) kaya wag kang matatakot ha . wag ka ng malungkot :*** i love you :) gsto ko na mag sabadoooooo! haha yayakapin kita :)

* insert sad title here *

days lang after my birthday and i feel devastated and depressed. Sa sobrang depress nagkapatong patong na mga problema ko. Sana di na lang ako nag birthday haha kasi ganun din naman malungkot lang din naman. This year is gonna be the saddest year ever, birthday ko pa lang sad na what more on the coming days that's why i never expect anything from anyone or something. Kase when you expect and your expectation was not fulfilled you will be more than crushed and devastated. Parang ung exam ko lang sa HRM kala ko maalala ko ung mga inaaral ko, i studied for like 1 and a half day for that subject pero nung nag exam i ended up having a huge frown on my face kase nakalimutan ko lahat ng inaral ko. HOW FUN DBA :) tapos when you got home may tatawag sayo kinakamusta ka then sinabe mo na wala kang nasagot sa test tas saknya parang wala lang, okay lang din un ganun, never expect nga dba, tapos kkwentuhan k nya ng kung ano ano na hindi nya alam n badtrip ka sobra, AND YOU CALL YOURSELF AS MY SOULMATE? based on this experience your pretty much not my soulmate :) Tapos while i try to cheer myself up by reminiscing ung mga memories na sobrang saya ko, you ended up making me feel even worse, more than devastated i was burned to hell. Thank you for destroying myself-cheering-up method. Lumabas na din ung totoo mong kulay, sige kasalanan ko lagi sorry kung ikaw lagi may kasalanan, sorry kung hindi ko mameet ung mga demand mong " madali " sorry din kung di ako katulad mo na sweet and stuff wag ka na mag aalala i changed myself already, so when u get back home today, you'll never feel the old me, CHERISH EVERY FEELING BECAUSE IT WON'T LAST FOREVER but i guess the feeling that i have now will be with me for a lifetime. I have no life to live only a body to move , thank you for making me feel this way, even though it crushed me , i'll be fine you won't care anyway. Birthday wish ko? siguro hmm, sana may makaintndi sakn, please? if not i think i'll die THOUGHTS CAN KILL. I slept with tears on my eyes and woke up having a lot of morning stars, then i cried ended up having a huge puffy eyebags. I can handle this everyday i'm used to this and i'll get through this. LOVE can change either for the best or for the worst. I had a lot to say but the mind can't say it all in words. I HAD MY SAY, I WILL OBEY, BECAUSE TODAY I AM NO LONGER ME BUT RATHER I AM YOU.

meet my ever loving boyfriend, this is how he use to be before he met me....GAWD thank goodness you met me !!! dahil sakin pumogi ka oh =))))

the year wouldn't end without pictures :)

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

LOL grabe ang bilis ng araw!! and i don't wanna think about how fast time flies kase parang nasayang lang ung ibang araw ko sa pagiging random ko :)) ANYWAY :) 2011 was one heck of a great year for me, biruin mo nung 2011 GRUMADUATE AKO SA PAGIGING HIGH SCHOOL STUDENT, NAKATAPOS KME NG THESIS, I'VE BEEN WITH COOL PEOPLE like my best friends forever NADAHATAPABEBI, MET NEW PEOPLE, FOUND NEW CIRCLE OF FRIENDS, NAKAPASOK AKO SA UST and LEARNED TO LIVE ON MY OWN :) 2011 gave me different kind of challenges like COLLEGE, PRESSURE and FAMILY. I don't remember how I managed to overcome all these but i'm grateful to each person in my life that made me stronger and taught me how to live my life to the fullest. Living Mary Help was on of the saddest part of my life :( kase we've grown old in that school and I never put into mind that someday i'd be leaving it. Simula ng college life ko my relationship with God became poor and this new year i'm going to regain what i've lost. BABAWI AKO KAY GOD :) I LOVE YOU PO!! SORRY FOR BEING SUCH A DORK AND FORGETTING TO PRAY WELL :( actually may new year's resolution po ako.. first is MAG SIMBA EVERY SUNDAY!!! yeah ahihi.

Of course di makukumpleto ang post kong ito ng walang tungkol kay PAPA RENZ =)) 2011 is our year!! 2011 is never fun without him. i love him, yes i truly do. kahit minsan lagi ko syang di kinakausap, di pinapansin, laging sinusungitan, laging pinagsasabihan at inaaway at nilalait at sinusuntok at ewan ko na dami kong ginagawa sakanya HAHAHAHAH. Minsan naiisip ko may pagkasadista ako lalo na pagdating sakanya..cute nya kase umiyak parang si damulag lang HAHAHAHAH. kahit ba naman dito inaaway ko pa din sa paparenz =)) ZzZ weh pero seryoso thinking of not having him by my side is like earth with no heaven, he made each day worth it, he tries to make me laugh even though i really don't want to, he freakingly annoys me!!! that's why i love him soooooooo much nomnom =))) he can do all the mistakes he can do because i will give him every chance in the world. We are young, we learn and we become better :) We can grow from each other and someday we will become the best even though we're already the best AHAHAHAHA =)) I LOVE HIM and i won't fight this feeling anymore, i'll show it and i'll prove it. Nobody can love him more than me. HIS FOREVER MINE SO BACK OFF BITCHES. AHAHAHAHA. sorry for making you cry and making you feel sad and not important but really just look into my eyes and you'll see what you really mean to me. I PROMISE TO BECOME MORE LOVING AND CARING , happy new year puglet let's make 2012 a more awesome year :)

chikchikinana

minsan lumalabas ang pagkaubnormal ko sa mga pictures ko..di ko na nasama ung iba kase medyo madami un..HAHHA ung iba nasa facebook at tumblr :)) vanity...grr.

NOW YOU KNOW

need longer postssssss

wow a lot had changed and and recent na napuna ko is yoooong way nag pag ppost ko sa blog kong to. Reading my former posts and comparing it to my latest posts parang before more on long text posts pero ngayon madalas picture, picture with description..siguro dahil ito sa pag tumblr ko which affected the way i post things recently. Parang mas gusto ko yung dati kasi parang mas masarap basahin dahil sa mga details and stuff, well pero masaya din naman basahin pag may pictures :) so this time around i'll be doing more long text post para pag binasa ulit ako mas magiging masaya ako HAHAHA.OKAY.

kung long post lang din naman, recently parang lagi ako na-upset! kase feel na feel ko ang kapangitan ko =))) TOTOO!!! di ako nagbibiro seryosong usapan! tapos shet pumopogi si paparenz ko tas ako pumapangit....WADAHELL! ako na ponget!!! i'm doing things to train him not to miss me para hindi mahirap sa future , malay ko mamaya sikat na sya and he no longer needs me :) dadating din ung panahon na mapapagod sya kakaintay sakin pag nagtatampo ako at dadating dn ung panahong di na kami palaging mag uusap, kaya ako inuunahan ko na XD talino ko eveeeeeeeer. HARHAR. para di kami maghirap :)

ilovehimlikeinfinitymorethanbeyond:)

December 25, 2011 really Christmas?

post post blog blog. HAHA sorry late post :| napapasobra na ata ako sa tumblr nakakalimutan ko na ung first ever blog ko :) no worries that won't happen, minsan lang naman =)) err. This Christmas I have my tito's and tita here in Laguna, si Uncle Dale sa Liipa sya nakatira pero he usually celebrate Christmas with us tapos sila ate Pauline, kuya Niel, jason, Auntie Jenny and Uncle Ed taga Iligan * yeah sila ung sa Mindanao ung binaha and stuff, dito daw sila mag papasko dahil parang ang lungkot daw dun, and btw di naman sila masyadong naapektuhan bumaha lang naman daw saknila na medyo lagpas tao? safe naman daw sila except nga na bumaha.* hmmm. I forgot na kung kelan sila dumating di ako masyadong naghanda sa pagdating nila e :)) hmm~ bsta simula ng dumating sila kung san san kme pumunta~ parang halos araw araw umaalis kme, pero may one time na hindi ako sumama, sa tagaytay un! eh nakakapagod kase kakagaling lng namen sa EK nung day before tsaka di rin ako sumama sa Lipa at Green Hills, sumama ako sa MOA at EK. May plano pa ngang mag swimming kaso malamig kaya medyo 50-50 pa. hihi. Nung Christmas nag party, kainan tapos kunting inuman, half the glass lang ung wine ko mwahehe i'm no drinker i'm just a wanna be =))) here are some pictures ng mga pinag gagawa ko ngaung christmas break :) most pictures were posted sa tumblr ko pero i've decided to delete my tumblr para makapagfocus ako dito sa blogger ko :)

di ko na ippost ung iba madami kase =))

It is going to be a cold Christmas

Yaay :) its Christmas Season once again. Pero wow umulan malapit na Christmas, haven't blog for a while, picspam muna tayo :)

di ko magawang ilagay sa blog na to lahat ng nararamdaman ko. parang di ko mahanap yung mga salita para masabi o maexpress ang damdamin ko :(

Alam mo yon?

alam mo yung feeling na gusto mo sanang sabihn kaso dmo masabe kase parang nonsense lang din naman kapag sinabe mo pero para sayo IT IS A BIG THING? wala lang i often get that feeling . Usually pagnagtampo ako or sad or emotionally damaged di ko gustong iexplain sa mga tao kung bat ganun ako. Ewan kase ang hirap mag explain?? kase alam ko di dn nila magegets so why even bother explain. sayang effort laanggsss. Tapos ung sabhan ka ba naman ng GE ILOVEYOU... something..dko na tanda kase wala parang pagalit or what nya sinabe yun!! GE HA GE! parang kasalanan ko kung bat gusto ko na matulog at ayaw ko syang kausapn! GE iloveyou blah blah. SIGE LANG. err. dame ko pa naman sana kwento sa kanya ngaun pero nakalimutan ko na lahat kase naiinis ako sakanya :D<

a day or two

DUNNO EXACTLY what to write!!!/post. my day started out very good ! i woke up then went to CM to meet up with my bestfriend *coz she's comin over and we are going to watch some chick flick movies* lol soper boring nung mga movies!! kala ko masaya pero parang ang boring. we watched two movies pero we did not finished the second movie because it was really boring pero feel ko pag ako mag isa nanuod nun maeenjoy ko kase ewan ko =)) thats how swagerrific i am. anyway! we decided to go to SM calamaba na lang :) i bought cake for my mom and dad coz' its their anniversary tapos we ate white hat tapos kwentuhan for a while ng mga old times :) WE MISS HIGH SCHOOL. tapos umuwi na kame around 4 something. ako naman nakpagkita pa kay paparenz. ayaw ko na sana kase mpapagod lang sya kaso gusto ko dn naman kase wla lang gusto ko lang naman sya makita. naglakad kme papuntang CM - napagod ako kakatawa i don't even remember why! bsta i had fun. tapos bumili ako ng iwhite and sya naman ice cream binili XP after that i hanged out sa bahay sa may garage kase malameeeg kasama ko si chichi. tapos pumunta ko sa bahay ng kapitbahay namen kase andun si April kinamusta ko lang sya :) she changed a lot thou~ but its still her. i love that kid! haha. aun tapos nung dumating si dadi bumili ako ng ice cream tapos nag dinner na kame.. dami food HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO YOU BOTH. ahaha :) i hope they enjoyed it.

TAPos NGAUNG GABI ewan ko nabusog lang ako tinamad na ko... hay tapos sunodsunod na ang kamalasan...wow perfect day? so not

10th monthsary

yup today is our 10th monthsary! YAY :) wala akong masabe...LAGI NAMAN E! medyo fail ung monthsary namen, dko masyadong naenjoy pero masaya pdn naman ako kase pinuntahan nya ako dto sa bahay tpos naglaro kame ng pingpong and nuod ng clips from youtube :)

gabi na ! lol actually umaga na . nagpuyat kame kse nga day namen. kaso sana di nlng kme nagpuyat kung aantukin sya agad :( ung tipong snabhan ako ng "goodnight na..." nagmamadali nang matulog??? osige nalang ako kase oo nga naman may pasok pa sya tapos antok na sya..oo cge matutulog na tayo, so far this is our worst day baby :((

t'was like a dream

T'was like a dream pumunta si paparenz sa bahay the other day (di ko na matandaan ung date kase di kami close ng kalendaryo HAHAHA) aun pumnta sya tapos andun si mama, nagulat naman si madir. hmm ano ginawa namin sa bahay? first nanunuod ng movie eh medyo parang nabore nman sya :)) nag Dota nalang kme sa shop namen eh kasoooo lge ako na-disconnected! amp nga un e langame n nga lang DC pa \(O_o)/ err tapos nag ping-pong na lang kme *may dala sya pang ping pong e**dpat kase ppnta daw sya sa burday ni jm eh tnatamad na sya *** ewan ko ba dun imba un :))* saya kaya magpingpong tas bsta laro laro lang tas nagpabile ako ng miryenda kay tenene hmm..bananaQ HAHAA k. pictures?? oh eto =))

why so terrible mom?

dreams wishes and hopes all crushed down into bits, i don't even know where to start! seriously i'm really sad. aldksjalkda maygawd :( si mama kase eeeeh. BAKIT BA KONTRA BIDA KA! pwede ba suportahan mo na lang ako sa gusto ko?? SUPORTAHAN NYO KO SA GUSTO KO PWEDE?? ang sakit kase dba..sasabihan ba naman ako ng wag masyadong close kay paparenz kase bata pa daw ako at madame pa daw mangyayare , madame pa daw dadating...ano ba ibig mo sabhn..hindi kami magtatagal?? laro-laro lang to? ma! knock knock!! wala namang ganayanan..mahal ko yan e hayaan nyo na ko ginagalingan ko na nga sa pag-aaral di ba. Nag aaral na ko ng mabuti para wala na kayong masabi against us. Gusto ko magtagal kame as in forever ewan ko bat ako nasasaktan ng ganito..ewan ko :( i want him on my life and no one else!!! kung meron man dadating..pake ko sakanila may mahal na ko and i'll do anything for US to be FOREVER. I didn't love him for just experience!i don't want him to be just a chapter in my life!!!! i want him to be the leading man in my life, the sidekick who is always there, the bestfriend who always will be at the beginning and at the end!!! i love him because i know it's worth it and because i have faith in him. i know i'll be happy with you that is why i keep holding on to you. I know i'll never have regrets because i have him in my life. God please do help me in my battle for love :'(

dunno what to say

hi blog who you doing? i know you are pretty much fine . That's good but too bad i'm not. i couldn't explain how much hurting and heart aching i'm feeling right now. i thought that he'd loved for who i am and for what i am. so why does he have to change me??? why do i need to change?? so i am not allowed to have a crush on anyone except him..yeah that's cool..but not having a crush on anyone including celebrities *which are practically just fandom , illusions, dreams and just mere fiction for us girls..* dude just please wake up could you!? before you met me i'm head to toe inlove with a japanese celeb!! Gawd i changed my self up! i gave away my precious CDs albums and stuff!! because i thought you are worth the change... i tried my best to satisfy you.. i'm not that sweet cuddle type of girl..but for you i tried to be one...to tell you the truth i can't even concentrate on my studies with you hangin' around but i still tried to give my best because i thought you were worth all my efforts. I'm a girl..and it is natural for girls to look on someone cute or hot or handsome just how boys just roll their flashing eyes over a hot, sexy curvy something girl.. i needed you understand me.. to see through beneath those smiles..the deeper me. I've lied a dozen times for you, i shed tears more than i could. i just wanted somebody who could understand and love me for who i am...and i thought you are that somebody.

you only thought of yourself.. you never thought of how i really felt.. you can't see through my mask.. i can't be anything you want i can't give everything you want ... i am just not good enough...that's what you made me felt.. i hope to be healed soon. i'm tired of being hurt .

first day for 1st year college 1st sem break

12:00am nag start ung day ko :) yeah kinda puyat. before this day sempre nasa UST pa ko having my last exam about 7- 8:30 in the morning then went back at my dorm and left mga 10:00 then otw to laguna :) tapos i got here like 12? or 11:40. tapos sinamahan ko si mama sa Cm kase magbabayad daw sya tapos sinamahan nya ko sa salon de sta. rosa kase i'm getting my nails clean and painted :) STRAWBERRIES <3 yes. tapos mga 5 i went to my former school MHCS kase FLR to get together with my friends / batchmates :) medyo konti lang kme . tapos chikahan tapos may mga eksenang d namen inaasahan :)) bxtah un n un " mag ingat sa tingin" lol. tapos pumunta kme ng tropical.. arkhaye's treat kase bday nya ngaun kaya nilibre na kme on that night :)) tapos i got home fixed my problem..OUR PROBLEM and i lead to a hard decision :) pero keribells naman. but for now we are okay and i hope that we can get better. and today i don't know exactly what i'm going to do but please let it be productive XD

hello long weekend

haha i'm home sa dorm and i have nothin' to do :) imma have a post about my long weekend hmmm nung saturday i visited my former school!! yaay HAHA miss ko na mag aral dun miss ko na everything about that school ung strict policies, the sisters, schoolamates , friends, food? :)) places and eveeeeeeeeeents!! HAHA miss ko na mag sym imba. HAHA bxta madame ako namimiss sa school :) pumunta ako ng school kase namimiss ko na un atsaka para suportahan si paparenz<3 HAHA may game kase sila. Vball at balita ko panalo daw sila? ayun natamaan ako ng bola sa mukha ang saya hindi ba? JOKE! haha tapos nagkita kita kme ng mga batchmates ko kaso medyo konti kami kase ung iba ata tinamad ung iba naman may pasok :( sayang naman nu minsan minsan na nga lang magkita eeeeh. aun masaya naman :) after kong panuodin si paparenz mag vball umalis na kme at pumunta ng sm nanuod kme ng final destination 5! err yoko nun brutal or masyadong fdhjaskdljlas madugo? hmm bxta ang eemba ng mga scene kase puro namamtay natatanggalan ng katawan? haha mga ganun :P tapos oo nga pala bngay ko kay paparenz ung mga gift ko saknya pang birthday nya, monthsary, atsaka aniv. HAHAH excited ako bkt ba :))) ayun tapos hindi ko tanda kung monday ba un or sunday? ahaha finoot spa ko si dadi :)) mga natitripan ko talga ee. aun tapos nung gabi nilagyan ko ng iwhite sila dadi mama at kuya o san ka pa sana nag derma nalang ako imbis na hrm diba HAHA so aun nung tuesday mga hapon balik na ko dito sa dorm :) un laaang

I LOVE MY B-BOY SWAGGER